QQ VI

I fell asleep during Barack Obama's speech; here it is I waited all week for it, but the NyQuil took me away. I'm glad I feel better, and I'm even happier that I watched it on DVR.

I'm glad summer is almost over, I'm tired of sweating.

So McCain says Obama has no foreign policy experience, thus his recruitment of Biden; McCain's choice voice for VP has even less experience than Barack; she's been Governor of Alaska for 1 year?!

I'm stressing myself out with a project I'm working on with Joe; funny thing is, as creative as I consider myself, I'm already having writer's block. I've been reading like crazy for some inspiration (i.e., books, comics, magazines, watching "action" movies) - none as of yet.

Sometimes I want to go back to school, but then I remember why I was so happy to be finished with it.

I learned that wishes don't require any work, dreams have to be chased.

I slept a whole lot the last few days; I guess that is the real cure to the common cold, chicken soup doesn't hurt either.

I watched the Kite Runner yesterday; good movie, but the book, as it always is, was better.

I have a story to tell, I'm just afraid that people won't want to read it.

When I was living at home, I used to sit on the couch and listen to my mom play the piano when she was practicing for church - yesterday I sat and listened again. I love to hear her sing and play.

I haven't gone to the gym in a long time, I've grown tired of chasing ideals that others have placed on me. Sometimes I hate them for it.

Sleep is addictive.

I had the opportunity to teach during Small Group this week; blessed time. Vahid, Grace and I had much to discuss and it was a great time. I cannot wait until this Wednesday.

I want to be more than I am, but don't know how to get to where I want to go. If I knew where I wanted to go, I'd have a starting point.

I often envy other people's happiness when I can't create the same for myself.

Sometimes I feel like my dreams drip through my fingertips with the same fervor water runs through a strainer - all that's left are remnant of what was, and clues as to what may be.

I miss lifting weights.

Sitting Around

I spent some time yesterday eating with a friend. I remember the smiles that we shared and the conversation that we enjoyed. I remembered how we both ate too much and walked as if we were carrying lead in the pits of our stomachs - so much of the day yet to fill and I've the feeling of lethargy and tiredness. It was a good memory. It was a moment that makes me enjoy life. I've always considered the dinner table an intimate space; a place where you can look into the eyes of your friends, feel their souls, listen to their words and know their hearts. I love the fact that my dining table is round, that way I can see everyone's faces. I love the fact that it is round to show that there isn't one seat that has more importance over the other. I like that it's round because it makes us all equal. I like it even more when I have my friends sitting around my round table eating mounds of food sure to make us round so that, when the day nears that we may no longer be around we'll think of the times we sat around the round table trading stories, tales of mischief, heartaches, and our hearts rewards that cement our legacies, our impact on each other's lives before we're in the ground. My life is a gift and everyday I breath I thank God for it.

Forgiveness

I love that Pastor Bob has been teaching on forgiveness. It is truly powerful to not only know that I've been forgiven, but by forgiving I am made whole. Isn't it easy to carry a grudge? Isn't it easy to remain angry or to refuse to acknowledge or talk to the person that hurt you? Aren't we foolish sometimes? As PB was illustrating on Sunday, we are the ones who are at a disadvantage in situations such as that. Most of the time, the person who we're upset with doesn't even know that we're upset with them. Forgiving has not been easy for me, but as I read in The Shack, the first step is just to say it out loud and repeat it daily, "I forgive...whomever..." and then pray for them. I've been forgiven, truly learning how to forgive is the most emotionally empowering sensation I've experienced. It is a release of constriction; freedom from the burden of futility.

What a Game!!!!!

My friends arrived dressed impeccably; the ladies looked absolutely beautiful, as they always do. I immediately began to regret not being able to join them. I went into my room, and took out my book and knocked out a couple of chapters. My plan was to stay up to watch the US Men's Basketball team play Espania in the gold medal game. I felt my eyes getting heavy, I leaned over and turned off the lamp to take a brief nap. I got up, played my guitar and turned to NBC.

The game, what is there to say? It is the best basketball game I have ever seen in the last few years. A collection of NBA talent, full of bravado, chemistry and determination. The team was tested early and often as Espania, led by Pau Gasol, Ruby Reyes and Juan Carlos Navarro led a charge that put the U.S. team back on their heels. Lebron James and Kobe Bryant both found themselves in early foul trouble having to go to the bench midway through the first quarter with two fouls a piece. Enter Dwayne Wade, aka 'The Flash;' Wade putting the US team on his back made three's, got in the lane, made steals and ended the first half with 21 points. Lebron James, who was said to be the best player on the team was inexplicably absent in the final minutes when the reigning NBA MVP took over the game. Kobe drove the lane hitting runners, hitting clutch three's, blocking shots, and making timely passes as he was personally involved with 15 straight points. He stepped up in the final minutes hitting a three and coverting it into a four point play. The exuberation on the player's faces was matched by my own. Here I am, sitting in my home alone, I had an opportunity to spend time with them, but chose instead to watch the game. The game was a basketball fan's ultimate wish, I only wish that my brother was here to watch it with me. We would have gone "B - a - n - a - n - a - s" as Gwen Stefani says.

Well, I'll stay up a few more minutes and watch the medal ceremony. I'm a huge basketball fan. Kobe Bean Bryant is my favorite player in the league, and I'm amazed at the skill level of the atheletes; their remarkable talent, skill and inspiring play had me wishing again. It took me back to when I was a teenager watching ball games in the living room of our house, my holding a basketball, wearing baggy shorts and sleeveless t-shirts. My brother and I would cut the sleeves off of old shirts and use them do-rages to press our waves into place. My mom would make some snacks in the kitchen and my sister would even sit around the T.V. Inexplicably absent would be the one most families would assume would be watching the game, my pops. Instead he'd be in the garage tinkering away under the hood, or waxing his cadillac, or building a computer. He never took much interest in sports, but my mom - what's there to say. She was there hooping and hollering, give my brother and I high fives, trying to do chest bumps, jumping up and down and saying, "That's what I'm talking about," after every dunk or shot made by Michael Jordan or Scottie Pippen." She'd even call me and Charles from work to see when the game was coming on because she wanted to be there to watch it with us. I miss those times. Tonight, the competition being seen on the screen would have been the perfect backdrop to another evening of raucous excitement and exhuberant celebration if only my family had been there. What a game!

QQ V

I was standing in line at the DMV yesterday; the chatterbox behind me said, that she hated coming to the DMV because she felt like she was a number. The old surfer dude who was listening to her, leaned back, "You are just a number at the DMV." I swore he was the voice of Crush in Finding Nemo. I wanted to ask the girl, what gave it away; maybe the incessant, "psssccchhh, Now serving B-042 at Window 12. Now serving..." Goodness, that is stuck in my mind right beside the memories of, "Spill on aisle 3, spill on aisle 3," "The white zone is for loading and unloading of passengers only," "14 Mary 3, we have a robbery in progress..." I know, too much T.J. Hooker. If you're asking, who's T.J. Hooker, I'm older than I thought.

I like George Clooney. He's that actor that takes himself so seriously that he looks like he's taking himself seriously even when he's playing a role where he's not supposed to take himself seriously.

If I were a food critic, I'd say that the food I ate for dinner last night receives 1 star, the company would make a bowl of oatmeal enjoyable. Lyn is awesome. I love that my memory will be, "Oh, that's how it goes," when she put the chopsticks back together.

So last night, we're sitting around having a discussion on Mark Chapter 2. The baby runs in, smiles, jumps, opens up his arms to welcome everyone, and then runs back into his room. Every few minutes, he repeats the behavior as we all hope that we're the ones lucky enough to receive the lavish attention he's going to put on you. Seeing him, hearing PS, then looking over at G and staring at the permanent dimples on her cheeks from smiling, then looking back at PS with his eyebrows brushing the tip of his hairline because of his excitement...this is where Caleb gets it from. G genuinely loves people and PS genuinely loves talking about the Word; "Great Stuff" as he's known for saying.

I operate on the periphery of politics. I know a little something about a lot of things, but realize that I need to more more about the important things.

QQ IV

Some jokes are not funny, at least the ones I say.

I noticed nobody argues with a compliment that they agree with.

What separates normal folks from those that are deemed intelligent, I've come to believe it's that the intelligent folks take more pride in the moniker "intelligent."

In moments when you feel as if you're alone with God, there is nothing that you can hide from him. He seems to know it anyway, he just wants us to trust him with it. Easier said than done. I'd have to know him to trust him, I don't think I know him as much as I know of him.

The funniest thing about secrets is that there is always somebody that knows them.

Is it truly prudent to adhere to the code of avoiding friends and ex's friends when dating or wanting to date?

Does having faith mean that you're willing to wait for what you're praying for, or as Christopher Nolan penned in The Dark Knight's character Harvey Dent, are we to make our own luck?

Television tells us that the lives of the rich, the affluent, and the wealthy are more enjoyable than those who are not. Even though the shows are manipulated and produced for drama, it's rare for people to laugh. I wonder why?

I miss watching episodes of the Cosby Show. My family used to be like that. One day mine will be. I hope.

I've decided not to commit anymore hope to the hope that I'm going to be noticed.

I believe dreams are only as valuable as the work you're willing to put in to attain them.

I often feel like I don't have anyone to talk to. I feel honored to be trusted to hear the situations my friends are dealing with, I wonder if they're as interested in me?

Living a life without purpose, is not living.

In case you haven't noticed, I want to be a writer. I'm in the process of figuring out what I want to say.

I'm in love with the possibilities living offers, I feel sorry for those who don't enjoy their life.

Barack Obama or John McCain - it doesn't seem like a difficult choice for me.

Money has taken priority over having an opinion. It seems there's a price to pay if you have the "wrong" one - no matter who you associate with.

I love reading comic books, playing the guitar, and walking. Sometimes, in walks alone, the moon shines bright enough for me to know that there is light in darkness. Is that what Christians are suppossed to be? How do other religions view their place in the world?

Who's right (e.g. politics, religion, morality)?

I'm going to take a moment to run my thoughts through a strainer - doing so will mean I may be out of reach for some.

I've spent so much time playing it safe, that I've forgotten what it means to live on the other side.

There is talking about something and there is action. Did you notice that people who love what they do, do it. It is in the doing that you find out they love. Other may be fond of something, talking about it incessently, but they're never caught doing it.

I feel like I'm in a race with my past. I want to win at everything I've lost and win so I don't have to deal with anymore loss. A bit idealistic if you ask me, success is learning from loss and looking at winning as an application of the lessons that were learned along the way.

Over the last two weekends my friends threw surprise parties for their spouses. They each (i.e. the wives) looked at their husbands with gratitude for being loved. The ones of us, who aren't in that situation, relished the opportunity to participate in their happiness, but it wasn't long until we wished for the same for ourselves. The funniest thing I find about it all is that the only difference between me and them is that they aren't living in fear of letting their hearts be known. Who of us are?

Indecision is often met with scorn - I don't think that it should be. The perceived indecision may be, truly may be that person's value in the right decision.

I like making people laugh, I love it even more when people make me laugh.

Whining is so much easier than doing something about what led to the whining in the first place.

How much value should be placed in a lesson taught, if the teacher doesn't apply them themselves. It's like having a fat personal trainer..."How much value should I put in their recommendations for health, when they didn't even believe in them enough to practice it themselves?"

I'm tired of gross out movies, they're not really funny - just...well, gross.

QQ III

Paul Pierce has been making the claim that he is the best 2 guard in the NBA, that his game is better than Kobe's, is better than Lebron's, is even better than DWade's. It was the funniest thing that I've heard. Prior to Boston bringing in two Hall of Famers into their starting lineup, he (i.e., Paul Pierce) couldn't even get his basement dwelling team into the playoffs, and this was in the Eastern conference. You don't even need an above .500 record to make the playoffs. You only have to win a 1/3 of your games and you could probably get in as the 8 seed. The Lakers have made the playoffs every year after Shaq's departure, except for once. Kobe took the Lakers to the Finals last year - he was the only All Star, future Hall of Famer, Olympian! Lebron took the Cavaliers with Damon Jones starting at the point to the NBA Finals, and people like Donnie Walsh (i.e. New Kids on the Block Fame) is going to speak as the preiminent authority on basketball greatness saying the Paul Pierce is the best player in the world. That is laughable. He is the same guy who wasn't selected to the U.S. Olympic team, and when he did go, came home with a bronze medal.

Well, I guess by that last post you can see that I'm passionate about basketball. It is a nice distraction. I feel a bit numb right now, and have for a while. I filled out a personality profile recently, one of those thing-a-jigs that tell you your strengths, weaknesses, areas of improvement, things you do well and the like. I can't say that I was surprised by anything on the list, but it made me recognize a lot of the things that I've heard from other people about myself that had previously been known but unacknowledged. Did you notice that people always get excited when they have an opportunity to talk about themselves, I guess that's why listening is such an important part of communication.

Did you ever notice that people don't like hearing negative things about themselves?

Have you ever thought that God is only as real as you allow him even though he's real even if we don't allow him to be?

If you see Bobby Flay on a website, does that automatically make it legitimate? If so, I want to go to Cafe222 for breakfast one day.

I believe that everybody lives with a hope of being loved. I believe that people fail or succeed based on their love for themselves or the love they receive from the people around them. When somebody loves themselves enough to believe they matter, they live that way.

I'm beginning to believe there are truths, and the truth. Many of us receive truths, but rarely do we ever know the truth.

Everytime one of my friends announces that they're getting married or that they're going to have a baby I feel happiness and my heart fills with joy. When I leave their presence and I'm alone, I wonder if should cast a coin in a well for the same story.

I like to watch Diana Turasi play basketball for the Phoenix Mercury, she has a nice game.

I like that people always advise me when I ask for advice. Does that mean that I've waisted their time when I do something that they advised against?

I love blues music, but I hate the realism of the pain behind it. As authentic as it sounds, listening to it makes my pain even more real.

The Katinas have a lyric that says, "Strength is found when we wait upon the Lord;" I felt my eyes welling up in my cubicle. My co-worker asked, "How do you do it? How come nothing seems to bother you?" If she only knew.

Full Circle

Being greeted by a smile says "Welcome to my home," better than can be imagined. As I entered PS' home, the little one ran up, rather galloped and hopped up to also greet me. He always has this grin on, his smile is contagious. You want to laugh with the same vigor he does. My godson was engulfed in cartoons, made the rounds with the obligatory hello's and was back to Nickolodean. I'm sure preachers wished that people would pay as much attention to their messages with same ferver sports fan watch games and kids watch cartoons. Small Groupwas going very well last night, then, as if on cue I noticed my cell phone was ringing off the hook. I thought, I've never been this popular, so who could be calling so much. My mind started scrambling as to who it could be. It was a full circle moment.

2 years ago, a friend of mine asked me for a ride to the airport. So, I got up early, made it to her house and waited in the parking lot. Not knowing which apartment was hers, I picked up the phone and called, and called and called and then called her roommate. No answer, so I came home. Shortly after my friend woke up in a panic - she made her flight and made it home. Last night, we were back where we started this time I'm the one not on the phone. I immediately regretted the cookies and the donut holes that I'd eaten during the day. I left my car parked in front of PB's house and leaving PS' house, and knowing my friends flight was scheduled to leave in an hour, I had to run. My breathing sounded like two bears wrestling. To my surprise, my knee held up. I think I'll program my promises in my phone. To my friend, I'm glad you were able to make it home.

Back to the Shore

I haven't had a lot to say of late. I guess it's because I'm trying to identify the feelings that are rushing through my head. Have you ever been in a moment that seems surreal, almost as if it were scripted, and at the receipt of information, your initial reaction is the truest. You may cry, you may laugh, you may get angry, but in that moment, however your feelings are displayed, they are real and can be identified. It isn't until later, when you've had some time to reflect that you realize the ramifications of those feelings and what led to your being at that point.

Do you remember swimming in the ocean as a kid and when the water was placid, you could snorkel and see all the fish and the coral and beauty the ocean offers? It seems that as violent as the ocean can be, it is a place of serenity and stillness. But then you try to snorkel on a day when the waves are crashing with violence against the shore and you're trying to make your way through the surf. You know that just beyond that break, the water may still rush with aggression and malcontent, but at least you'll be in place where you can observe the sea's activities. You take the time to open your hands and peer at the weighted object, still as it rests in your hand, but only temporarily.

It is something that you've held onto for times of elation and celebration, you've cherished it when sobs were the only music your ears heard, you wished you could hold onto it when you were alone. In your rush to get to your place of stillness, you find yourself flush with a wave that causes your body to turn. Water rushes into your mask and you fight with determination to break into the air and breath. While you're reeling from the impact of the wave, you drop your treasure. As the water churns overhead and you see more bubbles than transparent blue glass, you wonder if it is worth risking your life to regain it - to grasp it once more.

Becoming inattentive to all the signs that are around you resulted in a treasure being lost, buried beneath the tranquil chaos of the sea. You look down from the water's surface, in contemplation over a pending decision, should you scale the depths of the seas to regain it? Or, should you lift up your head to bathe in the air necessary for life. When you lift your head, the water escapes from your lungs, you cough to release the past and any pain. Slowly you begin to make your way back to the shore, in silence.

Good Grief

I was sitting around yesterday, browsing the internet, perusing stuff to purchase and I realized that I even hate shopping online. Anyway, I came across this website, and for the life of me I cannot remember what it was called, but they were selling t-shirts that read, "Nobody Cares About Your Blog." I was aghast with disappointment when I thought to myself, "Really?!"

QQ II

I made fun of a friend today for being overweight. I shouldn't have. The last time I was underweight, my age was in reference to a trimester.

The smile on my sister's face today when everyone yelled "Surprise!" made the trip worth it. I hope she saw how much we love her. We know how much she loves us.

I learned from Shawn and his wife today that I don't have to change to be accepted, I just have to be confident in who I am. I also learned that a relationship with Jesus should not be a performance. If I'm performing, I know of Christ, but don't know Christ.

Bernie Mac passed away today. He was the only comedian I knew who talked about black life in a way that made me say, "I'm that guy. I'm proud to be that guy." You don't know how many times I've wanted to say, "I'm not scared of you mutha...." I'll leave the rest to your imagination. RIP Mr. McCullough; you're missed already.

Delivering scorn is beginning to feel as bad as receiving it. Maybe love is taking up a bigger place in my heart.

My heart feels glad when I hear my friends say, "We've got the perfect girl for you." In my heart I pray that Jesus is saying the same of me for her.

GM is working on a electric-gas car that is to hit showrooms by 2010 or 2011. It'll differ from hybrid cars in that it'll run off a lithium battery and use gas sparingly as opposed to the current proliferation of crossover vehicles that run off of gas with the battery being used sparingly or at low speeds. I hope it works.

The juxtaposition of good and evil is the theme of Star Wars; the battle between being ruled by our emotions (i.e., "flesh" to Christians) or the force (i.e., the "Spirit" to Christians). As Anakin Skywalker eventually succumbs to the temptations his feelings offer we learn in the power of the dark side. As Christians, we are sinners first, saved by grace second. Just as Luke had to battle against his father's curse, sometimes we have to escape the inherent sinful traits our parents pass to us and learn to trust and use the Holy Spirit to guide us, take advice from wise sages, and act out of our conscious mind, rather than blind devotion. Obi-Wan provides the advice, the force is the spirit, and the story parellels that complexity that is human emotion and spiritual devotion; a paradox indeed! The only reason the story is on my mind is because it was on the tube for hours at the birthday party today.

I like the attention I receive for my intellect. I like the love I receive for my personality. I hate having to be humbled. I believe it is best to humble myself than to have God humble me. Nothing that is done is of my own accord. I'm granted life and reason because he blessed me with it. To think that I am, by myself something, I come to find that I, by myself am nothing. It is the love Christ showed for me, coming to die for my sins, being willing to take the pain of the cross, even if I were the last man alive on earth, that makes me something. I don't want to be reminded of this; I pray that I will always live and act as if I truly know it.

Is anyone else excited to see the Olympics; I can't wait for track and field. I wonder how many gold medals Michael Phelps is going to win.

I am blessed because I have great friends and a wonderful family. I miss my brother. I want to know my nieces better. I miss my sister. I can't wait to watch a movie with her. I want to play basketball with my nephew; I'm sure he's going to be a natural.

I should offer to share my food, but I'm not ready to, so I'm not going to until my heart is right. Smile. Ciao.

Double Q: Quick Quips (QQ) I

On July 25, 2008, Randy Pausch lost his battle to pancreatic cancer. He had a moving, inspirational, endearing appeal to live life in the fullest and mark our triumphs, our failures, our joys and our loves. I was moved by his speech entitled "The Last Lecture." http://www.thelastlecture.com/

Brett Favre was traded to the New York Jets yesterday. The Packers said, "they owe him, " obviously not enough to keep him.

The US Olympic men's basketball team plays this weekend against the host country China. I sure hope they win.

Work has been so busy that I feel like I'm starting each day on a treadmill that's already moving - kind of like the underwater current Crush sailed through in Finding Nemo.

I think that I have tendinitis in my knee.

I am happy to hear that some of my friends are emboldened to try new things. I pray they reap good rewards in their ventures into newness.

I liked Superman: Doomsday and Justice League, The New Frontier. I'll pass on Batman: Gotham Knights, I'm hoping Wonder Woman will be better.
http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1810036252/trailer

The Alchemist is my favorite book and I don't even own a copy, but I definitely recommend it:
http://www.amazon.com/Alchemist-Paulo-Coelho/dp/0061122416/ref=pd_bbs_sr_1?ie=UTF8&s=books&qid=1218119678&sr=8-1

The radio said that it would be a hot one today, I cannot wait for Fall.

As I get ready to begin my day, I'm reminded of something Jay Leno said, "You cannot be mad at somebody who makes you laugh - it's as simple as that." So today, I choose to laugh, to smile and walk with a belief in the hope that comes from knowing whose I am and where I'm going.

Time in Heaven

I took a little time last night to reflect. I stood on the edge of a cliff and marveled at what my eyes were digesting. I found myself in awe as I wondered why the clouds were trying to hide a light under a bushel. They seemed to rest at the edge of the horizon, hugging the vastness of the ocean to make it look like a pond. The violent calm seas were surrounded by mountainous ranges that seemed the perfect canopy for the serenity I experienced. Amazing; He keeps it all in order. There was a moment, when I stood there alone. I saw birds playing as they bathed in the light that remained. I marveled at their courage, they had the strength to enjoy the moment when so much water was between them and land. The waves kept rolling in, but only in sections. I kept expecting the ocean's secrets to be revealed as they'd burst on the rocks. The clouds kept rolling, very slowly, seemed they were gawking at their part in the drama that was unfolding. The moon wanted to break out and show that it could glow too. There was this brief moment, when there was a break in the clouds, the waves stopped rolling heavy and strong, but moved to a stillness that invokes awe and fear. The light then twinkled to crown the water; this is only a glimpse. I spent some time in heaven yesterday, but I was still here on earth.

Weights

I was in the gym this morning pressing weight, like a lot of it. And this guy, who I'd asked for a spot, with a sarcastic grin on his face says, "Hey, why don't you throw some more weight up there." If he only knew that that wasn't the only weight I was going to be pressing. If he only knew how I tend to carry around my cares and concerns - how they literally weigh my mind down and prove that I'm not trusting God as I should be. The burden of doubt is too much to carry sometimes - the proof of trust floats like a single feather in the wind - free!

I asked a friend yesterday for some advice, financial and the like, and he said, "Will, you need to know what you want so that when God gives it to you, you'll recognize it as a gift from him." He even followed his advice with a guarantee, "If you'll just trust God, I guarantee that by the end of the year these prayers will be answered." I snickered to myself, with a "Yeah right?" attitude. I don't believe in sooth saying and I don't believe he was sooth saying. I believe he was saying that he's got proof that God answers prayer, I do too, but it's hard to believe for the big stuff isn't it? I'm more prone to believe the U.S. Basketball team is going to win the gold medal in the Olympics. I even took some time to believe that the Lakers were going to win the Finals, we see where that got me.

I don't believe there is anything wrong with having hope that people will do the right thing, but I do believe it is wrong, no that's not the right word - tiresome, it's tiresome, and frustrating, and crippling to not live trusting God. Peter admonishes us to "Humble ourselves under the mighty power of God, and at the right time he will lift you up in honor. Give all your worries and cares to God, for he cares about you" (1 Ptr 5:6-7).

He does. I know he does. PS spoke on Sunday and pointed out that God raised up Joshua, that Joshua was there for the parting of the Red Sea, the pillar of fire, the ten plagues on Egypt, the water gushing from the rock- he was one of two to come back from seeing the promised land with a good report of faith that they could overtake it. The other 10, the ones who doubted, they saw God move too, but instead they decided to concentrate on the circumstances. I want to be like Joshua. I want to see all of what God has for me. I've been one with a negative report. I guess it's time to see the land that has been promised with my faith. The beauty of it all is this, as I pursue him, and begin to walk in what he has for me, I bring what he's given me to those that I interact with along the way - we all get a piece of his glory.

Greater than Imagination, Who?

So yesterday, I was sitting on the couch over at K and L's place, and a little one was drawing pictures in my head. She stood behind me, dancing and jeering, all in hopes that I'd catch her in the act. They were laughing and giggling and having fun, all the while I was attempting to sleep. There is a beauty in children that we all should try to match, and a lesson to be learned that we should all try to enact; live in the moment, and enjoy every second, life is too short to get lost on the temporal.

My grandmother gave me some great advice yesterday. Who knew it would be so profound? I guess that I did; my father's quote runs through my head, "You don't get to be old by being a fool." I called her and was just checking in. She told me that I should be there to enjoy some ham, collard greens and sweet potatoes, mac and cheese with ice tea - I was only left to reminisce on how wonderful those Sunday meals used to be. I told what I was going through and all that was on my mind. She listened and injected "uhm hmmm," and "agh huh's" to calm the swells that swooned within my soul as could be heard with my words. She let me finish and she replied, "Baby, all you need to do is pray because you can't fix it on your own." I love my grandmother - she is wisdom in my eyes.

I enjoyed a great service learning that God is in everything and that the reality of God is greater than my imagined perception of God.

I wondered if off-shore drilling is the gravy chain we're putting our hopes into for lower gas prices. If anything, the relief would be many years out and not occur in the immediate.

Mrs. Lazaga told me that the subconcious reacts to the conscious mind. If in our conscious we say that we cannot, or that we are going to fail then our subconcious blindly follows. Are we then to be surprised if failure is the result?

It seems that when it comes to ministry, beginning a statement with, "I don't..." means that God'll put you in situations where you will.

I got to talk to my sister yesterday and learned that we all dream of having the same things. The great thing about having dreams is the value they accumulate in the pursuit of attaining them. I'm excited about what the future holds!

Will somebody ask Ilene if she's up to cooking before she leaves on vacation? Call me selfish, but her food is good. I like that yogurt dish with red onions and cucumbers that can be put over rice and curry. I wish somebody would teach me how to make that, Shawna, are you game?

I'm back to writing long posts. Keep your eyes out for an action-adventure series being developed by me and Joe.

Left to Ponder

I walked out to my car, got in, put on my seat belt, and dialed a number on my phone. I adjusted my bluetooth, which began to pinch my ears when I put on my glasses as I prepared to drive. The conversation went well, some of the points made hit home. Some of the points made, left me to ponder, whether implementing them was for me. Some of the points made, let me wonder, if the suggestion was best for me. The point of seeking counsel is to ask a question you cannot answer, I didn't know the answers before I asked them, but I knew them when it was done.

This week I've been left to reflect. This week I've been inspired to dream. Last night, I looked around the table and thought of all the new things I heard, relishing the opinion of a burgeoning critic, which left me impressed to say the least. My friend was back from her vacation, and she picked up right where she left off. A new haircut was deserving of flashes of light, and a red carpet walk. The man of honor smiled and laughed, and I could see that he was blessed. How lucky am I to call this group friends; how blessed I am indeed.

Who is This?

The scene was surreal. It embodied every nook and cranny of the conversation that we just held. There were smiles, there was laughter, there were squinted eyes, and tears building up in the corners of our faces. We were truly in the moment. I was relishing every second of the time I was spending with my friends. I felt like I was the focal point of a scene in a movie. The slow music started and the camera slowly zoomed into my face. It captures my eyes moving lower as they're caught gazing. In that one instant, joy is communicated. My eyes are fixed on Giggles. My heart feels warm, as I begin to recall periods that were spent in her company. I remember and notice that Giggles is in every moment. She makes eye contact and listens when somebody is talking to her. One minute with Giggles, and you'll feel like the most important person in the world because she actually cares when she asks, "How are you doing?" She gets it. She knows that God first loved her, without condition, she lives her life to do the same for others. She's a silent heroine, and I'm glad to call her my friend.

I also had the opportunity to spend some time with one who needs no introduction. As she entered the room, it grew still. There was shock, but the type that speaks of reverent awe. There was an instant paucity of words, "Is she, the one before me, a faux to my history books, or is she who I imagine she is?" Her presence truly spurred songs..."did you know, that your baby..." It cannot be. Was, was, could it be Mary? Nope it sure wasn't, but for a moment it seemed she was.