What am I Talking About Now?

It has been a long and arduous process, but I am beginning to realize that I alone suffer the greatest loss as a result of being apathetic. The people around me may not receive the best that I can offer at times, and they may be inconvenienced, but the resulting lack of hard work directly affects me. Whether it be the attention I pay to my diet (i.e., my health), or the attention that I pay to ministry (i.e. growing closer to God), or the attention I pay to the ones that are closest to me (i.e., my family); I will be the one living with regret if I don't change. My dad, a wise, sensitive and gentle man once said to me, "Son, of the two; it is better to live with remorse than it is to live with regret." I shake my head sometimes when I stand on a shore line watching the sun begin its descent to hide behind the water at how marvelous God is and how much he orders the universe and how disillusioned and miserable I've felt in the midst of it all because I've not taken the responsibility to act upon my regrets. Sleeping long hours, or hiding behind hobbies doesn't do anything to change regrets. Being afraid to fail, and using that as an excuse, makes 32 years seem like a long time to realize that it is better to have failed with no excuses than to have failed from not trying. There are things that I want out of life that I am hungry for. I feel as though I've held them in my hand, just long enough to realize they're there but not long enough to enjoy them. The dreams that I have for myself ease out of my hands with the same ease that it took me to get them. I have come to believe that you appreciate what you have to fight the hardest for. I know that much to be true of myself. I miss the feeling of accomplishing that thing, that one thing that you have to change your whole life to attain. I remember being in the 10th grade in Guantanamo Bay, Cuba. We had just gotten in a new teacher and a basketball coach who was an avid runner and former collegiate track and field athlete. He told us all, those that wanted to play on the basketball team, that if we even wanted to try out, we had to run a mile in under 6:30. I have been a bit overweight since I was in junior high school. I would always walk when we had to run the mile in P.E. classes in junior high and high school. I never received very good marks in P.E., funny considering that I could and would play football and basketball from dawn to sunset. Anyway, my dad and I went started going to the track a month before tryouts. I wanted to play on the team so badly that anything he suggested, I did. We started with wind sprints of 100 yards, at the end of that 100 yds, I had to either do 10 push-ups or 10 jumping jacks. I was so exhausted, I was spewing vomit like a pressure cooker releases steam. I got up the next morning and practiced my shot, and went jogging. My initial times were a little over 8 minutes, but I stuck with it. On the day we were all supposed to run in order to try out for the team, I ran the mile in 6:24 seconds. I nearly passed out from the nausea and exhaustion. I made the team. I felt so good that I had overcome areas of weakness to accomplish my goal. I miss that feeling immensely. Even more so, I've lived with regret and remorse at not being willing to motivate myself to do the same for me now. I plan to change that. My friends and family have always loved me enough to tell me the truth. I have not regrets for that!

So Annoying!

There are a few things that really annoy me. I mean annoying to the point of feeling like spitting on epitaphs and cursing old ladies. So annoying this thing can be, you'd want to tear up a phone book or scream in the ear of nun during prayer. OK, it may not be that bothersome, but it sure as heck feels like it sometimes. Everybody that drives has driven in such a way to annoy somebody else. Slow drivers ask, "What's up with them?" when people are driving fast. Aggressive drivers get peeved when slow drivers are in the fast lane. People that make right turns from the middle of the lane wonder why most people make right turns from the bicycle lane. Joggers don't like people walking on the sidewalk, cyclists don't like runners on the pavement and drivers don't like cyclists that ride in the middle of the lane like they're a car. All of these things, howbeit ever so debilitating to your senses and well being, won't kill you but they may cost you some money - how many of us have slipped our way through a yellow light hoping it wouldn't turn red...awww man, I just saw a flash!? Even though all the aforementioned stuff is about as annoying as a bee in a sleeping bad, parking lot tail-gaters take the cake, especially when you're at the same grocery store and more especially when you are in your apartment complex. They pull so close behind you that their windows fog up from your car's exhaust. They ride their horn like their arms are weighted in lead. If you're turning left, they're trying to pass you on the left. If you're turning right, they're trying to pass you on the right too. You have one chance, no more, no less, to get your car into the correctly designated space. You grit your teeth, lean your body up and peer down at the front of your car. You start to make that swooping right to get into your space on the left. You concentrate, looking in the rear view mirror with a stink face to rival city employees cleaning up pigeon poo - leaning in you make the turn. No damage to your car, no damage to the cars beside you, just a feeling of relief because you felt hurried. Not me, not anymore, from now on, like my friend Tina said, "Whasssup fool, you's just gonna to have ta wait, peeeriood, dude!"

Sporadic Rambling?

I can say without trepidation that I often spend too much time thinking about what other people think instead of thinking about what I know. I say this to mean that no other person should be the definitive authority when it comes to me defining myself and my existence in context to the world around me. I heard Lebron James say, and I'm sure he heard it somewhere else or his wisdom is profound for his age that, what we do in life echoes throughout eternity. My life has meaning and the ramifications of that meaning will reverberate in the physical as well as the spiritual. I believe that my spirit will join God in heaven when my time here on earth has come to an end. The question I ask myself is the impact that I will have while I am here. How will I leave my mark? What will I do that is of enough effect to last when I no longer occupy my physical body? I figured that the first place for me to start is to give of myself for the betterment of those that are around me. I also thought that it would be good to live for the moment, plan for the latter, but refrain from the fear of tomorrow - as the good book says, it isn't promised, thus the importance of understanding the relevance of today.

I'm the Eldest!

I can't recall how many times my mother or my father would implore me to supervise my siblings by reminding me of my birth order. They'd say stuff like, you're the oldest, they follow your example, your responsible if anything happens to them. There were times when blame was placed at my feet, even when I didn't have anything to do with it. There were good times and there were bad times as well. The bad times always happened when they'd reply, you're not the boss of me - I don't have to do anything you said. I'd respond telling them that mom or dad left me in charge. Last night, after watching Slumdog Millionaire, I am going to start saying, and will teach my kids (when I get some) to say, "I'm the eldest, you must do as I say." That was the best line in the movie for me. Any backtalk or refusal to obey was met with, "I'm the eldest, you must do as I say." I wish that worked in every arena where I was the oldest person in attendance. It would make things so much easier.

Kettle Corn

We were surrounded by throngs of people lost in the flurry of tasting new foods and sharing Christmas cheer. I wrestled my way through a crowd, even shared my prize with a random stranger, but after texts and phone calls from a friend, I secured my own bag of Kettle Corn. The entire night, everyone snacked on handfuls at a time, to the exception of one, who'd pick out one kernel of corn at a time. The holiday bliss was free in the air, and all we did was stare when we heard the Polish band...Something new to my eyes, never before seen 'live' it was, but cute as ever seeing the kids perform traditional Indian dance. From Brats, to catfish, to hushpuppies and crepes, kettle corn reigned supreme!

Say Cheese!

Sometimes I snicker when I see or hear campy romance stories. I laugh at the joy others feel when they receive the gift of being loved by someone else. Side splitting laughter bellows from my gut when I see tears rolling freely in a movie built on a love story yet...my favorite movies are built around that premise.

I empathized with Superman when he screamed to the heavens when he found Louise dead from suffocation. My eyes refused to blink when Bruce Wayne's parents were gunned down inspiring him to become The Batman. Goosebumps rose on my arms when William Wallace took on the English because a noble man killed his wife. After every brain numbing, face crackin' beating Rocky took, he screamed out for Adrianne. As Rambo's machine gun spat,"rat-tat-tat-tat, rat-tat-tat-tat," I saw how much he loved a country that he felt didn't love him.

Isn't that what we are here for and looking for, in some way or another? My laughter has been mistaken for ridicule, when really it should be received as joy. Seeing my friends happy makes me happy, and more especially - seeing them in love gives me a reason to laugh out of an excitement for the joy I know they're feeling. Say Cheese! :-D

Food, Music, and Chatter!

Yesterday, I sat across the table from a very good friend of mine. I listened to the chatter our forks were making with our plates. I found myself amused when that chatter was overwhelmed by sounds of teeth sinking into pancakes. It sounded like we were picking wet sponges up off the floor. The breakfast was a delight, but was made the better when I took the time to listen to what my friend was saying. She said, "I have a really good feeling about this Will. You really should do that." I often marvel at the wisdom that faith exudes; the wisdom to believe what your heart tells you and the faith to know that it is more than a simple hunch.

The day continued, and we found ourselves at my Pastor's home playing music, laughing, telling stories and eating...again. My friend departed and I sat on the couch watching football and listening to the whirl of the vacuum cleaner as it searched out every mite of dust and loose pebble like a squirrel rummaging for nuts. My pastor sat in his favorite chair surrounded by his most precious gifts; their pictures adorned the walls above his head. His heart, his cherished muse, the punctuation to his success sat in front of him. They laughed, and they both giggled. They soon finished each other's sentences.

We were off, we had a movie and dinner to catch at a friend's home. We piled into the mini-truck, or lunch box with wheels as I like to call it and headed out. First, we had to pick up my friend. We opened the car door and she jumped in. Soon, the conversation turned to the gifts that my friend had received on past anniversaries. My friend belted out, "OMG, where can I find a man like that? A man that would do the same for me!" At the same time I thought, "Where could I find a woman that I'd want to do all of those things for?" A silence engrossed us all. I bowed my head and smiled.

QQ XVIII

Why is fear always easier than faith?

Does strength and doubt reside in the same place? If so, what determines which will be employed?

Who knows what they really want?

I believe the biggest obstacle between success and failure is how you measure both and what you're willing to lose to accomplish each.

It's weird to find out how people see you; it seems they often see you different than you see yourself, or according to my experience of late, they see me differently than I see myself.

I've yet to experience anything more beautiful than hearing a baby laugh.

Having to ensure needs are met often take away the ability to live the life you dream about. Or, as it has been my experience, worrying about handling the responsibilities associated with living has taken away from my willingness to pursue the things that I dream about.

Sometimes I feel like "later" passed me, that is why I am glad that I have right now.

I hate it when my prayers are answered differently that I thought they would be. It seems to me that all the rules change and I'm again left relying on the one to whom I prayed to in the first place. Funny how that works...

This One Queston...

When I was growing up, I remember singing a hymn in Sunday School. Our teacher would sit behind a small piano that they had in the basement. We'd all gather around her and she'd lead us as we sang, "They will know we are Christians by our love, by our love. They will know we are Christians by our love." After some of the events that occurred to me yesterday, I'm left to wonder in what instance "they" will question whether or not I am. There are moments, a plethora of moments, those that are even undefinable when I've been asked, "Hey Will, I thought you were Christian!?" It is to me, a very condescending, judgmental question.

The person asking the question is bringing their own ideas of religious servitude into play, their own preconceived notions, and their own definitive ideal on what the label means. I ask what have I done, or what am I doing where you'd doubt my faith. Is there something occurring where my actions warrant disdain? But maybe, maybe my view upon the situation is not objective enough. Could the question be more of a plea, or could the question be a sign of respect. The first question (i.e., a plea); a subverted voicing of a desire to be supported in love and in prayer? The second type of question (i.e., sign of respect); an expectation built upon a respect that has been forged through previous acts and actions?

I've heard it said that prison is full of innocent people. Maybe my view on the question is an attempt to escape the accountability that comes with it. Maybe I'm pleading a spiritual innocence at my lack of devotion to a faith I boast about. No matter, questions will come and go, often the things that are touted as being workable and productive are also subject to being proven. I find it ironic that I've decided to blog about a question that I've been asked repeatedly when I know exactly why it has been asked. This post should probably be in my personal journal; hypocrisy is always looked at with disdain and disgust.

One Piece at a Time

One year I went home for Christmas. When I walked into the front door of the house, my sister was working on a 1000 piece puzzle of lion. I saw the many pieces and said, "Steph, it's going to be forever before you finish that puzzle." I was the pessimistic cynic, she however chose to see the puzzle and all the pieces that had not been put into place as a progressive journey.

With each piece that she added, I was able to see her progress. She said, "Will, I'm going to put this puzzle together a piece at a time." I smiled, and brushed her off in my mind. I could only think about what I'd do in the same situation; seeing how daunting putting the puzzle together would be, and the amount of time I'd have to invest, I may have just walked away with a prevailing thought of what's in it for me when I finish.

The next year I again went home. We sat around the coffee table and on Christmas morning we began handing out the presents. As is a tradition in our family, Nat King Cole's Christmas album was playing, my mom had cut up some homemade Pumpkin Bread and the kitchen smelled of pumpkin spice, nutmeg and cider. My dad was leaning on the stairs, wearing his new overcoat and hat and my sister made her way out of the room. She came back in with a huge present that looked like a gigantic picture frame wrapped in exquisite paper. My dad, ever so gently, as he was known to do, which aggravated the hell out of us, started to slowly unwrap his present. He made sure not to tear the paper off, removing it so tenderly the tape was taken off a piece at a time. My annoyance at the delay was pronounced when I shouted, "We're going to be wishing you Merry Christmas next year before you finish opening that!" He looked up at me and smiled. It was his present and he was going to open it the way that he wanted to. When he finally finished, behind a shimmering pane of glass, bordered by an intricately designed rich wooden frame, I saw the face of a mighty lion staring at me. Each piece was in its place. My sister had finished putting the puzzle together.

Despite the painstaking hours, the annoyance at hitting a wall, the possible loss of motivation, she trudged onward and never quit. She saw each piece of the puzzle as an added item here and an added item there filling a desire that she had to present her hard work to her father as a gift. She loved him enough to give him a gift that required more than a Saturday shopping spree or an online order. It took her many days and many more hours to complete her gift. My dad wore a grin that would rival Bill Cosby's and walked over to my sister and kissed her on the forehead. His eyes couldn't hide the pleasure he felt at the show of love his daughter had blessed him with. I looked at my sister differently that day.

She answers so many of my questions with, "So what Will." Every time I think about quitting or not being able to accomplish something, as I describe the obstacles that are ahead of me, she interrupts me with her famous saying, "So what Will." When I told her that I had been laid off, "So what Will." When I told her that I didn't know where to start or how to write a book, she said...When I told her that I didn't think I'd be able to finish this or start that she responded, "So what..." I smile when I think about the unwavering faith that she has in me to accomplish the impossible. She often tells me, and has the framed lion to prove, that I can do and be whatever I want as long as I work at it a piece at a time. The next time I even think of quitting, I'm going to remember her. I'll say to myself, "So what Will," and then add another piece to the puzzle I call my life.

Personal Piety

I've been stuck on this phrase, "Personal Piety" for a couple of days now. I have wondered where justice and faith intersect. I've been curious as to why persons who voted to uphold Propositon 8 are being called persons that discriminate. I've wondered aloud why there is an "us" versus "them" mentality. As a Christian I believe that God demands and requires that we, pray, seek out, and embody a pursuit of justice - that evil doers are punished and those that are held in a manner of subjigation be liberated. World troubles such as hunger, slavery, the sex trade, poverty, should all be areas where justice is pursued. I now wonder why that doesn't happen. I believe that life gets comfortable. The more comfortable it gets, the less willing those that are comfortable are willing to be inconvenienced for someone else. They may not be true for all, but it has been true for me in some instances.

I'll part with a moving story. On Sunday, I watched Extreme Makeover: Home Edition. There was a man born with cerebral palsy. He said that he is on a mission to change the world one person at a time. I believe that was the underlying purpose of Christ's ministry - to change the world and let people know that God's will can happen on earth and in heaven by changing one person at a time.

Now What

When I was growing up, I loved to watch the sports documentaries. They were full of excitement and a bit of melodrama. The athlete would find themselves in peril. The narrator's voice would delve into an empathetic softness reminding the audience of the dire straits they were faced with. The athlete would come to a moment of decision. They chose to focus their energy on being the best that they could be to the benefit of their family. They'd all say, "I am here because of the people that supported me," or "I knew that I needed to make it to this point so that I could help my family." They realized that life had handed them lemons; being born to a drug addicted mother, being raised in abject poverty, being orphaned, having a special needs sibling, losing their homes to fire. Life handed them all lemons, they instead, with the power of God made lemonade.

I am currently faced with a new challenge. I've spend the last couple of days trying to figure out what I am going to do, how I'm going to fix the change in my circumstances, and what to do if they continue to change along their current course. I am not sure what tomorrow holds, but I guess that's the beauty of living - getting an opportunity to see the unknown and watch it develop into a known. I have long wanted to write a book. I've been afraid of trying. I've always thought that I didn't have the tools, writing wise, to be able to finish it. Now that I have a little bit of time on my hands, I believe that I am going to get started. Who knows, maybe one day they'll be a documentary about me. It will talk about how his life changed on 10 Nov 2008, but it was a welcome change because it provided an opportunity to pursue a dream. "I believe it is a lot harder to walk when you don't have a destination," that will be my quote when I allow Larry King to have the first exclusive interview. He doesn't talk to amateurs, he only holds court with the best of the best.

November 4, 2008

I exist today as not only a participant, but a witness to history. His story has become my story and will be told to my children and my children's children. Today, the dream that you can be anything you set your mind to became true. Today, labels were transcended. Today, fears were transcended. Today the content of a man's character propelled him to the highest office in the land. Today, the Rev. Jesse Jackson stood in front of President elect Barack Obama. Today, the most powerful woman on daytime TV, a billionaire many times over, stood with tears in her eyes - there is power in having a dream.

Langston Hughes once wrote, "A world I dream where black or white, whatever race you be, will share the bounties of the earth and every man is free" (Hughes, "I Dream a World p. 311), free to make choices, choices that forever change the landscape of America's history, where the freedom to make a choice led to a collective psychological freedom from the restrictions that sex, age and race have for so long imposed. Today became a sign that reinvigorated the hope that comes with believing in a dream. Today became an answer to a question posed on Jeopardy. Today became a marker in history where the question will be where you were and what you did. Today creates a new reality. Today is surreal! Today will one day be a holiday.

Today, I believe that anything is truly possible.

Today is November 4, 2008, the day Barack Obama was elected president of these United States.

QQ XVII

I believe everybody has a story, but everybody's story isn't for everyone.

Prayer should precede worry and be the relief when worry begins to resurrect itself.

I think it's funny how we're all searching for the same things, but arrive at much different ways of attaining it.

It is OK to genuinely express your feelings; at some point a transition has to occur, when a boy becomes a man and a girl becomes a woman in mentality and attitude.

If you aren't willing to add a dry log to someone's dreams, walk away before you become a wet blanket.

God doesn't answer prayers in an "almost" fashion. He exceeds our expectations and gives more than we expected.

Don't let the disappointments in life overshadow the happiness, joy and love that can also be found.

Money won't buy you happiness, but having it will pay for things that make you happy - even if it's only temporary.

I can do something great on my terms - as soon as they're in agreement with what God has planned.

What Am I Talking About Now?

When my nephew was born I told my sister that he was beautiful. My dad said, "He can't be beautiful; he's a boy." Indeed he was right, but he missed the intent of my message. My nephew was beautiful because life was just beginning for him. Everything was new, each experience was going to mold and the shape him. He was completely reliant on his mother and father for protection, for love, for survival. He only had one form of communication. Anything that he needed could only be communicated one way. His eyes roamed rooms and landscapes taking in everything. Sometimes I feel that adults are just as defenseless as a child. We exist in a world where something new can and does happen everyday when we take the time to notice.

I experienced the emotions that connect to being wanted, needed and missed. I would not trade any of those moments.

I was encouraged hearing a friend's testimony; she spoke victory over her situation, stood strong in the midst of her trying obstacle, yet embraced and received the prayer I petitioned our Lord for.

A close friend of mine had a baby this week. I held him in my arms. He licked the roof of his mouth and lips savoring one of his first meals (he'd just finished being fed by his mother...I know what you guys were thinking). His aunt said, "I've heard a lot of stories about you. My sister says good things." There I was, a broad shouldered, husky, stout man reduced to smiling to hide from crying; a kind word does go a long way.

I played a little basketball this week; I miss being able to play that game the way that I used to.

I've had conversations with someone who's very matter of fact. The things that are said make them someone I just want to avoid. Sometimes, I don't even want to acknowledge their presence. How terrible is that? I spent a week navigating through the responsibility of being acknowledged and the privilege of being noticed. There are a lot of people out there who don't experience being needed, or wanted, or missed. There are lots who don't know what it is like to acknowledged. What's more ironic is that I've spent the last few weeks belabored over my disdain for their antics and their words and they don't even know it. I've wasted time and energy putting my dislikes in a bottle that's slowly churning and moving towards bitterness. If it's allowed to ferment it will turn to hate. I believe it is time for me to just let it go. Sometimes it's not that simple, but in reality it is that simple.

I was sitting in the chair at the dentist's office. The metal hook was scraping my teeth. It sounded like a medieval knight sharping his sword with a stone. My ears were ringing and all of my muscles were tense; my body felt like I'd spent 1/2 an hour doing isometric exercises. My dentist then proceeded to say something profound to me. I marinated on it a while; taking risks means there's a chance of failure, but the reward for success makes it all worth it.

Here are some random questions...

Is R. Kelly a free man today because his 'alleged' victims were black?

Why are we so subject to fear; fear leads to buying things we don't need because we think we'll need them to trying to fix things that aren't broken because were afraid it will...and the list goes on and on and on.

Prince said in a song, "Money won't buy you happiness, but it will pay for the search." I've been lucky enough to find it, how do you help those who haven't?

People want to be valued, shown love, and desired - what do I mean? Sometimes people want the attention of being needed whether it's for fun, for loving, or for intimacy.

Children are the epitome of impressionable; attention should always be paid to what is said.

An old man asked me yesterday why people don't pick up pennies, I told him that I do - enough of them will make a dollar. He told me he survived the depression, and that his father was making $15 a week. He went on to say how his family lost their home because his father couldn't afford to pay his $35 a month mortgage. Have times changed all that much?

It is OK to let people love you; get yourself out of the way so you can receive it when it happens.

I heard a saying on Sportscenter about a young man, 18 years old, who lost his life to cancer; courage + belief = life. My dad would always tell me I'm courageous when I'd do something that I was deftly afraid of. Life itself is a gift, a true, true gift of God.

Some people wish for money, I pray I never wish for love.

James Taylor was right; shower the people you love with love...I sound like a hippie huh?

As I was leaving a friends house yesterday, I went and hugged Jazz. I said, "Bye buddy." Her little sister, 2 and 1/2 years old followed behind me. When I finished my hug, she wrapped her arms around her older sister's legs and repeated, "Bye Buddy." She gave me a high five and then said, "Tunkle Bewillis, gib Daddy one!" She lifted his hand and laughed when I gave her dad a high five too. She is a beautiful child. I saw the vibrant appreciation of life from the elderly and impressionable minds of the young yesterday, I loved every moment of it.

The Kiss Cam

I went to the Lakers game on Tuesday. I went to a friend's house and we all piled into his car and made our way down there after we stopped at McDonald's. I was really excited, I was going to get a chance to see Kobe, the 3 time NBA champion, reigning MVP of the league, Olympic gold medalist - the best player in the world, and he got hurt in the 2nd quarter. The first thing I thought was, I skipped small groups to finally see Kobe play and he got hurt. All the games I watched on T.V. he was healthy, and I get to see him and he gets hurt. For $25 it was worth it. The couple of times he scored, he scored at ease. He is a great player.

During the game, the Kiss Cam was on. The camera's panned around to different couples in attendance. The first couple looked up on the monitor, saw themselves, then leaned over and kissed each other. This was the scene as the camera continued moving through couples. The audience responded with heartfelt oohs and ahhs seeing the couples in their displays of affection...then it got weird. Next, it stopped on an older, distinguished looking gentlemen. He was sitting next to, who I assume to be, his wife. She was dressed as if she just left the office, business slacks and a nice blouse. The camera zoomed in on them, he leaned over, started to close his eyes and stuck his tongue all the way out of his mouth and began to lick his wife's face. She was thoroughly embarrassed and his antics received a rousing ovation from the folks in attendance. The next husband, not to be outdone by the former, reached over and fondled his wife's breast during their kiss. I was like, hey man there's kids here, which apparently didn't cross his mind. Then a moment occurred that garnered boo's and jeers. A young man was sitting next to his 'soon to be ex' girlfriend tying his shoes. Their pictures appeared on the monitor. She looked up, saw herself and started giggling. She moved her hand, that was covering her mouth and tapped her boyfriend on the shoulder. He stopped tying his shoe and looked over at her. She pointed to the monitor and he waved. He didn't know that it was a kiss cam. She reached over grabbed his chin and leaned in to give him a kiss - just as their lips were about to touch he pulled away. Keith and I started laughing uncontrollably, booed him and the jokes started. The camera man went to another couple, another kiss, some more ooh's and ahh's then they panned back to the young couple. She wasn't smiling this time. She was pissed and he was slumped down in his chair - the audience booed him unmercilessly. My first thought was, I hope he enjoyed dating her because it's over now.

Here are some random thoughts:

Trust requires becoming humble enough to realize that you need help.

There is truth in Matthew 7:6, "Don't waste what is holy on people who are unholy. Don't throw your pearls to pigs! They will trample the pearls, then turn and attack you." Some people don't need to know what's important to you. They don't value your dream the same way you might because they aren't invested in it, the same as you are.

I want to do something great on my terms. I have no desire to live out other people's hopes and dreams for me.

I learned a valuable lesson this week, we are perceived in the same manner we imagine ourselves to be received.

If you want to fail at something, believe that you will.

Everyone needs love, even those that think they don't.

I want the freedom of ownership; the commitment to it is what scares me.

S.S. Bees

I went to the movies yesterday. I saw "The Secret Life of Bees," I had no other motivation for seeing it beyond the fact that I knew Alicia Keys was going to be in it. I found myself, about 2/3rds of the way through the movie listening to a symphony of sniffles as the the film reached one of its many climatic emotional moments. The film was playing, and the scene fell silent. I took a moment to look around the theater. Hearing all the sniffles at first made me laugh. I thought, "Man, all of these ladies are crying." The friend that I went with cried enough for me to think I'd have to start treading water soon. I begged her to chill out because I wasn't wearing a life preserver. Her sniffles of runny snot moistening her face from her eyes to her chin continued. I still found myself amused until one moment. I looked a few rows in front of me and saw two women sitting beside each other. They were older women, and they were completely engulfed in the story flickering like the northern lights before them in the darkened room. The sad scene occurred and as I was looking around to snicker at the emotions I was trying myself to contain, I noticed that they were still upset. They were still crying after the scene had ended. They hugged each other and were talking softly, almost as if they were consoling each other. Immediately my heart went out to them. I wondered what could have happened in their past to have made them react as they did. The sad moment was over, the symphony of sniffles had ended, but their tears continued to flow. That is when I felt the lump starting to build in my throat. I desperately wanted to leave my seat and find out what their story was. I will never know why they were so upset, but I guess that they'd experienced a loss of someone they loved, someone who was close to them, someone they looked forward to seeing and someone they missed when they were leaving. I began to think of all the people that I have in my life like that. I'm sure a symphony of sniffles will be the song that I sing soon. God has blessed me to have friends who I've come to love as family. Many of them have aspirations that will take them from San Diego. I will miss them terribly, but will rejoice in knowing that they had the courage to pursue their passions.

I Miss You Bo - Bo

I was able to sit and listen to some music tonight. I listened to a melody as it danced on my ears and slowly soothed my soul. Lyrics such as, "all my sins to bear," and "If it had not of been," were music to my ears. I've felt a bit conflicted of late. I feel I've lost the ability to be optimistic and forgiving. It is a skill that everyone living needs, but not everyone has. It reminds me of a moment I had with my great grandmother. She and I sat in her bedroom and she rocked back and forth in her chair. She'd slowly lift up her magnifying glass, hold it over her newspaper, read the clue, and then lean her head back in her rocking chair. She recite the clue out loud to herself, lean forward and write the answer, T R U T H for 3 down, U N D E R S T A N D I N G for 6 across. I edge to the edge of my seat, and ask my question, being sure to project my voice. I'd say, "Grandma, with all of the hate, racism, sexism, and discrimination you experienced, why aren't you angry?" I was confused as to how she could be so peaceful, so full of love, so willing to accept the same people who'd mistreated her - she replied, "Son, I don't have the time or the energy to be full of hate, b'sides Jesus told us to love our neighbor didn't he." Yes he did Grandma, yes he did. You may be wondering why I'm speaking on this or thinking about this. I guess I missed her today. I've been telling a lot of stories lately about things that she did that amused me, but I'll never forget how much she blessed me. I'll never forget how much I learned from her. I guess I'll never forget how important she remains to me. She loved to gather all of us in her arms, kiss our (i.e., me, my brother and my sister) faces and tell us how much she loved us. She'd say, "Come here my beautiful grandchildren and give me some sugar." I wish all of you who read my blog would have had a chance to meet her. She was love and proved everyday I was able to spend time with her. I miss you Bo - Bo; that's what we used to call her.

QQ XVII

So I got a sweet tooth last night and tried to make homemade caramel; didn't go so well. My house smells like a firepit at a campsite. Where are those Santa Ana's when you need it?

Dodgers are down 3-1, with a game tonight. I believe the Sox are down 3-1 as well. I was hoping for a Dodgers vs. Red Sox World Series; redemption for Torre and a chance for Manny to stick it to Boston. Let's hope.

Tonight is the final debate; McCain is behind in the polls and Obama seems to be moving ahead. At this point it's his election to lose.

I got a chance to eat dinner with PB and T last night; good times. T has a smile and a look in her eyes that scream authentic - there isn't a pretentious bone in her body. She always makes you feel important, imagine that - listening means something.

Roy Williams was traded to the Cowboys; that team has already imploded and we're not even at the half way point. I can't wait to see T.O. have a meltdown when Williams has more catches and TDs when Romo returns.

Kobe Bryant has been offered 83 million dollars by a Greek basketball team, his own villa, a personal staff and use of chartered yacht. Incredible that someone could earn that much money playing basketball.

Vote YES on Prop 8.

Late Night Ramblings...

I keep finding myself on the opposite end of some of my Christian friends political opinions. With the same wide eyed, open mouthed, ghastly sighs of displeasure I feel burning through my head when they're looking at me, I may (a time or two) have passed the same looks and feelings towards them. I think this is because when it comes to religion, money, family and politics - opinions become truth; those that contrast our own become lies.

Some More Thoughts...

Small Group went really well last night. I've found that I have one perspective and it differed from the one that was offered up by Tina; she illustrated that in problems she waits to see what God is going to do next. I've said that when I deal with problems I question God about why I have to go through the same thing again - like, why aren't his blessings permanent so we aren't ever in need of the same thing twice. In reading Mark 8, Jesus fed the 4000 when before that he had just fed the 5000. Even Jesus lamented that the people would never be able to receive a sign because they couldn't acknowledge the signs that were already presented to them.

Loneliness is one of the worst feelings on the planet; I think we all experience it at one point or another. The chasm the feeling creates is hard to overcome sometimes.

One thing that I find amusing is the show Parental Control. I like to watch it before SportsCenter sometimes. The black men are never picked when the parent's daughter is not black. Sometimes I get the impression the parents are saying to themselves, "As bad as my daughter's boyfriend is, she could do worse if she were to date a black man." Amusing, and tragic at the same time.

My dad graciously provided me with a quote by Anais Nin, "We don't see things the way that they are, we see things the way we are." I wonder what my previous opinion says about me?

I grew up in church and remember hearing my mom tickle the ivory and sing:
Jesus is the answer, for the world today
Without him there's no other
Jesus is the way
I heard that my whole life, but still struggle to believe it. The only way "the way" will work is if you allow him to lead.

Tina made a great comment last night, "The man who stops moving is the man who becomes bored with life and questions God." Life is not meant to be lived on the sidelines; we are to engage in it.

A friend and I laughed pretty hard last night, in fact most of the laughter was directed toward me. I was trying to parallel park, I backed up, pulled forward, turned the wheel, changed direction, waited for cars to pass, looked in the rearview mirror, peered over the edge of the hood when I heard, "How long is it going to take you to park man!?" We got out of the car and as we made our way down the hill on foot, laughter bellowed from our mouths. Who knew bad driving could be so funny.

A good friend of mine asked me if I could write about something that makes me happy as opposed to the angst ridden, pessismistic realism that often paints me as a cynic; if only the world were a better place, if only I truly believed what Jesus says!? Knowledge is an adherence to a fact, belief is the application of that knowledge. Knowlege without application is folly. Love is received when we allow ourselves to be vulnerable. To trust God means making ourselves vulnerable to his love by applying the knowledge we learned which build up trust to encourage and support our belief. I'm glad that grace is the first gift he gave.

I believe that life is to be lived and enjoyed, embraced and overcome and everyday is a gift. Anais Nin also said that "Life shrinks or expands in proportion to one's courage." I'm blessed to have known and know people who look at everyday as a blessing and live like each day is a gift.

A Few Thoughts...

Sometimes I feel like I live a semi-charmed kind of life, one where expectations and reality haven't met, but needed is a bridge for me to get from one side to the other. I've heard words and phrases that emphasize a need to walk wholly in the suit God's given me and I've heard words and phrases that are people's pleadings for me to walk fully holy in the life God's blessed me with. Seems life has been passing me by because I've refused to listen to those calls - I wasn't always able to hear them, even though I was the one saying them...at times.

Being selfish produces more frowns than smiles; believe that!

Not all advice is good advice; good advice will make you think twice. It will entice your ears, tickle your heart, plead with your head, and coerce your feet to movement.

I'd like to live a life to where when my name is heard it garners respect, instead of always having to prove that I'm deserving of it.

The saying, "Truth hurts" is very true - it does.

I like seeing my friends smile. I took a trip down memory lane with a friend today - memories bridge the past with the present - seems they produced laughs and joy in both instances.

I miss having a reason to smile, it's easy to forget that just having life is reason enough.

QQ XVI

There is a saying that is heard often during basketball games. The announcer will look at a player who seems to be doing too much, trying to play a style of game that isn't his own (e.g., Shaq shooting 3's and running the point); he'll say, "He needs to stop pressing and just let the game come to him" - I was reminded last night to stop pressing, to stop trying to play a 'game' that isn't my style.

Sometimes the announcer and the coach will say, "This player will have success when he let's the game come to him instead of trying to force his 'game' on the game" - I was reminded to relax and be myself, I don't have to perform my personality, I can just be me!

I was told this week that discipline will give me freedom. A great basketball player (i.e. Magic Johnson) is great because he masters the basics and fundamentals of the game which allows him to do the sensational. The same applies to all areas of life; mastering the rules allows the freedom to defy them.

If you haven't read, "Where We Belong, A Duet" by Maya Angelou, do so; I'm going to patiently wait for my "promised sunshine."

I like to say to people, the only way to get experience is if someone gives you an opportunity to attain some. The same applies to trust, the only way to build trust is to give someone an opportunity to be trusted. Should I give God more opportunities, or shall I take advantage of the opportunities he gives me?

Chris Rock said that people have more than enough time when they have a job, but can't seem to find enough time when they have a career - it makes me wonder which I have; I've experienced both feelings on the same days.

In Memory of Richard

There is a man who passed this week, and with pain in my cheeks I've tried to fight back tears. I chose to smile instead at the memories he left me with. He smiled, at all times, despite what his body was experiencing. From car accidents, to surgery, to weight loss, to triumph, and even in defeat, he never quit on himself, those that were around him or the relationship that he had in God. Every moment I saw him, and I stopped to ask if he was ok, he always said that he was fine and that God would bring him through. He never took a moment to feel sorry for himself or wish his pain on others. He never blamed anyone else for any of the problems he was having in his life. He looked at challenges as opportunities for God to have the victory and he was always the first to say and give credit to the one who brought him through.

It fills my heart with sadness that he is no longer here, but more importantly that sadness hides a peace that assures me he's at home with his Lord. I am sure he is dancing there - my boy was not afraid to cut up a rug. I'm sure he's running the soundboard in the worship room of heaven, soon to teach the newbies the right way to roll up a chord. This man has taught me more than he will ever know. He has taught me the value of trust and the value of love. He has taught me that I have two choices when an obstacle is before me, I trust that I will look at life with the same fervor he did and believe that there is a better day before me. Rest in peace my friend - I look forward to the day you remind me that my guitar is too loud.

QQ XV

I envy the celebrations baseball players have over a walk-off home run or a no hitter. It would be so nice if the same happened when you met your metrics at work or completed a project.

I wish time travel was possible; I would have flown home and been in church to see my father recognized for his work in his community. He is still my hero.

When I was a child, I loved to sit and listen to my mom play the piano and sing. I'd just come into the room with a book or a pillow and lay back listening to her belt out holy tunes. Those moments make me look forward to heaven, I'm sure it's a place that is also full of song.

I gave advice to a friend; I told him, "Great risk, great reward - little risk, little reward," then I cowered at the prospect of having to follow it myself.

In 1855 Joseph Scriven penned the lyrics, "O what peace we often forfeit, O what needless pain we bear, All because we do not carry everything to God in prayer." I'm finding that to be true. There is nothing worse than knowing the answer to a problem and refusing to use it. Some people call that stubbornness, rebellion, independence, a free spirit; the only word that's befitting the omission is stupidity.

One thing I admire about America is the freedom to which we can openly criticize, objectify, and lament over what we consider absurd, sophomoric, indisputable ignorant acts of the president without taking a minute to realize that he was re-elected; as bad as people feel he's been, how bad must Kerry have been not to have won?

I hate that critics say Barack will get the black vote, as if blacks will blindly vote for the only person of color on the ticket. The Rev. Al Sharpton, nor Jesse Jackson were able to make it this far in their bids. For as long as I can remember, my family had open discussions about presidential canditates, watched the debates and would sit around amongst ourselves to talk about the issues and who best represents what is important to us as individuals. I don't believe this time to be any different, and I do not speak for all Black Americans, but when the term is used it includes me. This will be an historic election for a multitude of what can be defined as firsts:
1. If McCain wins he'll be the oldest person to be elected president.
2. If Obama wins, he'll be the first African American to be elected President.
3. Should McCain win, Palin will be the first female vice president.

Personally, McCain's reluctance to generate new ideas, or probable solutions is infuriating...Senator McCain, why do you feel the bailout package failed to pass...well, thank you for asking, when I was in Vietnam...I don't believe this is a time for story telling.

What I love about politics and religion is the devotion its parishiners retain - in politics and religion, you believe that that which you believe is the absolute truth. I guess that's why opposing opinions and views are so polarizing.

I like that absolute morons have a chance to win multiple thousands of dollars by making a fool of themselves on national television. Our country is so media obsessed that I sit here judging those who purposely objectify themselves, then pass judgment on them, while they're sitting at home with a nice nest egg for a lifetime of humiliation - doesn't seem like a fair trade to me...

QQ XIV

I fully expected to hear PB say that the shortest distance between a problem and a solution is a straight line, but he said it's from your knees to the floor. Simple, yet profound.

McCain didn't even look at Obama during the debates, and often took a condescending tone by repeating, "You just don't understand." He never offered a solution, and filled the debate with Republican rhetoric and personal stories. His refusal to acknowledge another point of view worries me when it comes to negotiating with other countries given our standing in the world.

If you've not seen Miracle at St. Anna's, let me be the first to recommend it. There are scenes that make you wish there was a pause button; it hits you so hard, you'd need a moment to absorb what you've just witnessed. This movie emphasized the words of Langston Hughes, "I, too, am America."
http://movies.yahoo.com/movie/1809947151/video/9776132

Music is the therapy my soul needs to flourish. I spent some time playing music with a friend yesterday - how truly, truly talented she is, and how beautiful the music she was able to play.

I will never forget the words I heard my pastor say to me yesterday, "Above anything else Will, we're your friends." After all these years, that's never been in doubt, but it feels good to know that it remains that way.

Sometimes I envy parents; when I arrived at church yesterday, two of the cutest little kids I've ever seen ran up shouting, "Good morning Uncle Will." Children truly are a gift from God.

I could read Obama's biography, but I'd like to hear more about who he is. I found him refreshing and his Vice-Presidential running mate instills a lot more confidence than does Palin.

Talking Too Much

When I was growing up, I'd often get in trouble in school for one primary reason, my mouth. It seemed that I was never lacking in the ability to share my opinion. My opinion, although truly my own, was not always welcome or warranted. It wasn't until I got older did I begin to have a feeling that I should cater my words to not offend others. The same mouth that produces words that yield blessings can also be used to dole out curses were words my father would ask me to ponder when I had to explain my latest rift with a teacher.

This brings me to wondering what is takes to have a quiet spirit, to have a persona that doesn't get rattled easily and looks to admonish others rather than to punish them. I look at my peers, my mentors, and those that are coming up under me and wonder if I am what I know I should be and if I'll ever realize what I know I can be. I feel like talent without application is a waste; the same words that put me in the principal's office as a child, or makes my friends feel uncomfortable when I begin a rant, may need to be polished to reflect what it's my heart's desire to share. I've always liked hearing people share what they remember most and love most about loved ones; I pray that the words that I speak and that I write will be remembered for the positive impact they imprinted on others rather than the inverse.

QQ XIII

The great thing about having friends that know about who you are, where you've been and what you're good it is that you come realize that they care when you don't act like the person they know you are or find you when you aren't where you're supposed to be and encourage you to pursue what you're most passionate about. A good friend will value you; yesterday my friends made me feel valuable. I regretted that I hadn't spent as much time with them as I should have.

It is easy to sulk about a problem than it is to work towards solving them.

I wonder if dreams have any value considering how many people I've known who abandon them. I believe their value is based on context; coins in the pocket of a vagrant have more meaning than if they were in Donald Trump's pockets. Both value the dollar, but what they have already amassed will determine their value.

I've had the kind of work week that makes me yearn for 5pm; I'm blessed that I can say that I had a hard week, and even more blessed to know that God has provided me with a means of employment.

I was implored to live where I wasn't afraid to let tears fall; I laughed at the advice, but was moved that it was mentioned as a remedy. It reminded me of the first stanza of a Maya Angelou poem called Tears:

Tears
The crystal rags
Viscous tatters
of a worn-through soul.

I Thought it was Funny

...when I bought some new sunglasses, that I thought were cool. I put them on and shortly thereafter the side of my head began to hurt. A few minutes later and no light could make it's way in...I thought that was the point, anyway after telling someone that their clothing reminded me of a Michael Jackson video she responded with, "Those glasses look good, but don't sit on your nose. You should take them back." Retribution, payback, gotcha, were all looks in her eyes when she walked away with enough pep in her step to flavor a stale rice cake.

When my friend showed up, I said "Hi Sandeep, what's your brother's name, Moonshallow?"

QQ XII

...when my actions are stupid, they hardly take God by surprise.
-Langston Hughes

QQ XI

Having "a lot on your mind" is no excuse for being an asshole.

It doesn't take much for people to want to give up on you. It's even easier when you give them a reason to.

The best advice is rarely the common practice of the advisor.

Perception may not be the truth, but it is somebody's reality.

QQ X

It amuses me to realize that I, as a man take something away from a conversation that is completely different from what was actually said believing that what I took away from the conversation was what was said only to realize that women know what they said and men only know what they heard.

Somebody told me this week that I do the right thing out of an obligation to what I think "Christians" should do. One day I'll do more things right because I want to, not because I feel like I have to.

Friends make family seem closer.

A lot of money gets tied up in possessions; seems our identities are within the ropes too.

Having something on your mind doesn't mean it needs to come from your lips; nobody tells people with big ears that they listen well, but regardless the size of someone's lips, some people will say that this person and that person talk too much...I have no idea what I'm saying here.

Dreams remain an item that produces fruit as long as you nurture them.

QQ IX

I spent some time listening to the radio yesterday; I think it's sad, but ironic that I heard one statement repeatedly - people were afraid to completely trust in a vote for McCain because should he die, Palin would be their only alternative.

I love this parody from SNL (Tina Fey as Palin, and Amy Poehler as Clinton):

http://popwatch.ew.com/popwatch/index_page5.html

To paraphrase a section of a book I'm reading, Coelho reminded me to:

Take a chance and plunge in; the answer is only found at the end of the journey. There is anxiety in making a decision, even Christ sweated blood at a decision that was in front of him.

During Small Group last night, a friend of mine said something that I'd never thought of (that sounds a bit arrogant huh, like I've thought of everything, anyway...), the tactic of the enemy is to question your identity. If he can make you doubt who you are, what you know and what you believe, it won't be long before you begin to doubt whose you are. As Pastor Steve would say, "Good stuff."

QQ VIII

Good friends make for good company and even better memories.

Is it me or is it harder to forgive those that are closest to you? I think it's because they're the ones who have opinions that matter.

When I was younger I used to say, "I'll take care of that later," now that I'm older, I've realized that later is right now.

I've learned that everything from ministry, careers and education are all about production; doing more with less.

Nobody wants to hear excuses when they're waiting on a result; why aren't excuses legitimate reasons for incomplete tasks? I sometimes feel that an excuse is a gauge - maybe it just wasn't important.

We should relish and take the opportunity to enjoy the freedoms being an American affords us. People are being persecuted all over the world for their beliefs. Every time I hear a story of Christian martyrdom, genocide, famine, natural disasters, terrorist attacks, slavery - one life at a time needs to be touched by love.

I agree when PB said that everyone should have our respect, but it's up to them whether or not they keep it.

If you run away from a fire and move to a place to where you don't see it burning, you'll find that it'll continue burning whether you're there or not. Running away from problems doesn't do anything to solve them; there's just more to clean up when you return.

If time heals all wounds, how much more time do I need?

My friends bible doesn't crinkle when you turn the pages. Highlighter marks have bled through to the next page. Notes fill the white space once left on the page. Her purses are measured by their capacity to hold it...

I've said it before that prayer shouldn't be the last option, it should be the first option. Prayer is not an excuse for apathy.

Good Times at Petco

I had a lot of fun with my friends yesterday. The adventure started at about 4:30 and continued to about 11; can you believe that I stayed up that late? The company made it worth it. We piled into my car and immediately began our journey to the home of the Padres, Petco Park. After driving around in circles, we found a parking space. Did anybody bring cash for the parking; oh, thanks K for picking up the tab! We made our way inside and I stopped to look at the map. I'm the guy, who goes to the ballpark, I know my way around. Not so fast! While I'm staring at the map, my friends, let by K had already sojourned far enough in front of me that I'm glad I have a long stride as it was necessary to catch up. We made our way to the rooftop and there was tons of free food. We found a small table and chatted a bit. It wasn't long before the favorite food of the night was discovered and attacked live ravenous wolves in the Arctic; I placed chips, cheese and jalapenos all over the plate. Hmmm, so good, that is until the cookies made their way out. I heard, "Agh, cookies! I want chocolate chip...Oooh, I like the ones that are burnt or crispy on the sides...can I have that one...Awgh they're not hot;" notice I said nothing. I was too busy smashing the cookies.

Game time was approaching; we listened intently as L's favorite part of the national anthem was belting through the ballpark speakers. Her face said, "Egh, that was ok;" the singer didn't have that "It" that leaves memories or goose bumps. I made my way over to the Western Metal Supply Building rooftop to start watching the game, my company decided to go for a walk - to look around. I thought, "You're going for a walk, but what about the game?!" They left, happy as kids on the verge of summer break. I stayed, drank my soda, and watched Peavy get to work. That's when she slipped up beside me, put her plate down looked up at me and smiled. I took the initiative to start a conversation; why not, I said to myself. We began talking about how much she likes the view, that she likes the Tigers and the Pistons and wished they would have beat the Celtics. Baseball is fun, but her favorite sport is basketball; she can't get enough of it. My heartbeat quickened, and I thought, "I've got to keep talking to this one." She was tall; blond hair, beautiful smile and big green eyes that looked like they were full of questions. We talked a bit more, I met her friend, and then my friends returned. She didn't have much to say after that; maybe that was for the best.

We made our way to our seats, and the game started to take on it's identity. The Padres had average pitching; left runners stranded and made errors that resulted in the game being tied 2-2. Right in front of us, some kids returned with miniature Padres helmets full of ice cream. All of us looked at them, then looked at each other, then looked back at them. The decision was made; K and L got up and invited Sheba to walk with them. She declined, instead taking the opportunity to chill with me and ask questions about baseball and what the rules were. I learned how similar it is to Cricket, which is played in India. Prior to K and L leaving, Sheba indicated that she didn't want anything, and I asked for vanilla. We went back to watching the game and K and L made their way down the bleachers and around the corner on a mission to return with ice cream...or so we thought.

I missed Adrian Gonzalez's home run as I was chatting with Sheba, then I missed a couple of other plays. Thank goodness our view of the jumbo-tron wasn't obstructed as I was able to catch the replays. The 4th inning finished and the kids were nearing the bottom of their helmets. Sheba and I kept chatting into the 5th, then the 6th inning. I yearned to have my bowl of ice cream and asked Sheba what was taking so long. She indicated that she didn't know. The kids turned around and said, "Are you guys waiting on those girls who left to get the ice cream." I said, "Yeah, we are," leaning up I asked, "What do you think is taking them so long?" The kids replied, "They should be back by now." Maybe something happened, or did K and L meet a 'cute' guy as they say by bumping into them and they were caught up in an enthralling conversation. "Sheba, give them a call. I'm beginning to get worried."

She picked up the phone, and I listened intently, "Hello...where are you guys...oh (laughter)...Will wants to know when you're getting back with the ice cream...yeah...you didn't...(giggles)...doing what...you're in a store...shopping." Ten minutes later K and L walked around the corner content and without the one thing I'd been waiting 3 innings for...ICE CREAM. I was flabbergasted, they left with the sole intent of buying ice cream and succumbed to, were overwhelmed by, an innate desire to shop...at the baseball game...when they were going for ice cream, the shared their dismay, "They only had Padres stuff." "Imagine that," I said, while I was shaking my head and beginning to chuckle - this would only happen with K and L. I got up and came back with a bowl of...you guessed it...ice cream. K asked, "Where'd you get that?" I got it right around the corner. Good times.

We made our way back to the car; walking fast, walking slow, talking smack to cross guards with guns. K said, "Why are you in a hurry when there are only 24,000 people here?" I didn't get that one. We got in the car and it wasn't long before we picked up our previous conversation; politics. We were all a bit passionate as we shared our views and our opinions. It was my kind of night; great conversation, free food, an amazing baseball game, and great company. I can't wait until we can do it again.