Isn't Selfishness Easy?!

I was texting a really good friend of mine; complaining more or less about what I don't have and wishing for what I wanted. I made mention of my frustration with the ways things were going in my life and the disappointment I've grown accustomed to. Many of the things I hope for have yet to be realized, and due to their not happening in the time frame I'd constructed in my mind, I came to believe in some way that God was not interested in blessing me.

How easy it has become to believe the negative things about God. It has become even easier still to expect that more things and possessions are what I need from God, or what I am supposed to have because I'm a believer. It's a very "me" oriented attitude; I serve God for how he can serve me - a something for something trade, a business proposition, a deal. It's like saying God, "I'm going to blame you for the bad, give you fleeting credit for the good, and pray for more and more." When prayers like that are made, it shows where the heart truly is, where my heart has been. Where a man's heart is, there will his treasure be also - that's what the good book says. So if my prayers are always about me, my comments are always about me, my concerns are always regarding my own affairs, the only one who's occupying a great deal of space in my heart is me. How sad is that?

My friend opened my eyes to my folly, and reminded me how truly precious my relationship with God truly is. I heard a quote from a cartoon I watch called The Boondocks, Huey Newton told his younger brother Riley that "things are only as valuable as what you're willing to pay for them." I am so valuable to God that his life is what he traded to be in communion with me eternally. " The bible tells us that there is no greater love than being willing to lay down one's life for a friend. It's not the possessions that I own, or the comforts that I've come to enjoy that determine how God's blessing me, it's being able to commune with his spirit and realize that God has a selfless love for me. I desire to grow in my relationship with God and understand what it means to have the same desire in my relationship towards him.